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letters from katherine


How to Let Go

Have you ever wondered why it's so hard to let go of things?

Why do we struggle to let go of a routine, or a habit, or even a place or a person?

I've wondered this too.

To be honest, as someone who loves deeply and fully, letting go of people and things that just don't serve me anymore is challenging.

I love my routine. I attach to people and to places and things. I'm that kind of girl.

But when times change, when things or places are no longer offering me what I need, or when I find myself letting go of someone, I find myself in the throws of being unbalanced.

It's human nature. We like safety, we like to know what's happening. We connect deeply and soulfully.

Have you ever had a breakup with someone, and you find yourself out of sorts over and over again about why things didn't work out or how it could have been different? Sometimes blame comes into play, and even regret?

When you love hard, letting go is even harder.

Letting go of a thing, place or person doesn't mean forgetting about them.

It just means that our hearts aren't invested in them as much or as deeply.

Letting go of something or someone can be incredibly freeing for ourselves. It can allow us to have more room for new and different things to come into our lives.

FIRST: It's ok to be heartbroken and sad. Sometimes we try to bypass any emotions with letting go because they hurt. It's totally ok to have feelings and to ride the waves of grief. Feel the feelings. It may take a long time to process your feelings and to get through all of them. Anger, sadness, denial and grief are completely normal. Someday, you won't be so entrenched with the feelings.

SECOND: Get clear on what you have room for in your life OR what you can do differently now that things have changed. Change brings the opportunity for new things, what could that be for you?

THIRD: Find as much positive energy in your heart and body that you can and send it with love to the other being or thing. Shower them with golden light and immense love. Have kindness in your heart for them, and silently wish them well. If you are letting go of a thing or a place, send love to them and even thank them for being in your life.

FOURTH: Practice a cord cutting mediation. My favorite one is to sit in meditation, and imagine the person, place or thing your are letting go of. In your mind, shower them with light. Then, imagine a thick cord connecting you to the other. Now imagine cutting that cord. Gabby Bernstein has a fabulous cord cutting blog article if you decide to read more about it.

AVOID: Numbing your feelings. It could be easy to find yourself numbing out with alcohol, over exercising, over indulging in sugar, or even shopping. None of that helps. Anytime we attempt to escape from dealing with feelings, we just end up staying stuck.

Letting go is a part of human nature. We are ebbing and flowing all of the time with things, places and people. But, when we love deeply, letting go becomes even more challenging.


Katherine Phifer









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