I've been doing my best work at 3AM over the past few days. That's when this gem popped up in my head: "Your Baseline Doesn't Have to Be Crap, or Even So-So, Your Baseline Can Be Fabulous."
Let me explain...
I'm in the middle of a sorta detox. Sorta because the REAL detox won't happen for a bit, but I've already started in small ways to get the process going. And, the sorta detox is causing me to have wicked weird dreams and insomnia.
This week, after about 9 months of encouragement from my functional medicine doctor to get the test done, I was diagnosed with mold toxicity. And not, like "Hey, you've got a little mold in your system," toxicity but "Holy moly, you are at the top amounts of mold in your system for each and every type of mold" toxicity.
To be honest, up until this week, I didn't want to know. I had been putting off the test for months because I didn't want to know. I used the excuse that the test was expensive (it was) and that it was too much work (peeing in a cup, freezing it and going to FedEx was beyond what I could accomplish. If you know me personally, you'll know going to mail something is the hardest for me... I don't know why. I ended up doing a blood test that cost a bit more, but I avoided FedEx!)
Over the past few years my baseline has ebbed and flowed, but in the past year or so, I've really struggled. I was consistently feeling like crap.
And, I had tried lots of things. Changed my diet, did therapy for my low lying depression and anxiety (which helped immensely because I had other stuff going on too), worked with a health coach (who was fabulous), changed my supplements, did IV therapy, and started spending time in a dry sauna.
All good things, by the way. But my baseline was still just so-so fairing to crap, and I really had no idea. You know when you are living life to the best of your ability but you just can't figure out what the heck is going on? You chalk it up to life... I have busy, energetic twins. My husband is gone at work for days at a time. I am launching 2 distinct businesses... the list goes on. It's just life.
The symptoms I've experienced, which change daily, have included asthma, weird rashes and yeast problems (which are caused by Candida- also something that is common with mold toxicity). I have also experienced joint and muscle pain, felt like I was 80 and not 42, had increased irritability, anxiety and depression and felt like my world was going to go completely gray. Brain fog has started to cloud my mind. By 7PM I have usually been knackered. I craved heavy carbs, sugar and wine, feel completely despondent and enjoyed pizza a little more than I needed to. Oh, and I gained like 25 pounds.
By the way, these are just my symptoms. During my 3AM bouts I have been reading about mold toxicity and it effects people differently.
Where did the mold come from? My bet is that I've been accumulating it for years. My boyfriend's apartment flooded in Texas while I was in college... who knows how much mold was in that place. I lived in a very old apartment building in Cambridge, Massachusetts and you could smell the mildew and mold in the basement laundry room. We had black mold in our house next to our windows in Alaska (condensation and blackout shades caused the issue) that I cleaned without a mask. I love coffee, mushrooms and blue cheese. And, because I have a compromised immune system, I probably wasn't processing all of that shit I was breathing in or inadvertently touching.
I've been trying to figure out these symptoms for years, and I am really glad that I am finally ready to make some changes. Now that I am ready, I have to have my current home tested for mold before diving into full treatment. The treatment won't work unless where I am living is mold free.
In the meantime, I've started some supplements and changed my diet enough that I am experiencing some detox symptoms. Hence the 3AM wake ups.
And here's the thing I've been really thinking about. It doesn't matter if you have the same thing going on as me. What matters is if your baseline is so-so fairing to crap too. My current baseline is related to my health, which is huge, but someone else's baseline could be related to their work life, or their home life or their romantic life. These are huge too. All of these things contribute to our lives, and if the baseline is not feeling good, where do we go from there? How are our lives effected by our current baselines? Mine is impacted in lots of different ways.
I strongly believe in rest, light exercise (in nature if possible), meditation, eating foods that nourish your body and seeking support. I'm on that quest to bring my baseline up- so that my life is happier and more connected. That has been my mode for years.
If you would like some support increasing your baseline- especially if your baseline is low regarding your work life, romantic life or home life, reach out to me at email@example.com. We'll find a way to boost it.
Oh! And I absolutely love my Glow Mediation. It's one of my favorite things I've created. If you don't already have this, it will support you in a metaphysical way to boost that baseline too.